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Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Desire a daughter, not dowry…

“You are twenty-five, if you want to study ahead, you can do it after your marriage. It is a good family”, exclaimed her parents. 
“What if they are not okay for it papa?” she asked.
“Then it is your destiny.”
“I want to study.”
“We can either afford your education or marriage. In our community good homes ask for lot of money, we don’t have funds for both.”
“Forget about my marriage, I will only marry in the self-respecting family who have no demands. Else I won’t. Please papa, let me finish my studies and let me be something.”



P.S. Later, that lady finished her MBA and supported her wedding expenses without any dowry. She had set an example for many women to not to support dowry in any circumstances.
Why bride’s parents must pay to the groom’s family to marry their daughter? Are parents getting rid of their daughters with those huge pay checks? Or groom’s family is so poor that they cannot provide for one more member in the family? Were they not using any refrigerator or furniture before their son’s marriage? 
Will you as a woman pledge not to marry in a family who asks for dowry of any kind? Even if you can afford demands, can you stand to set an example for those who cannot?



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For this year's April A to Z challenge, I will put forward 26 women issues from 26 alphabets. These issues will be inspired by "real-life events" and will highlight social issues and other faced by women.  Some of these issues might be globally prevalent. 

With AtoZ challenge like all- bloggers worldwide, I too pledge to write on each day of April, except on Sundays. 


Drabble is a piece of fiction strictly in 100 words. 

14 comments:

  1. Ah! This is so common - to choose between marriage or higher studies/job.
    Wonder when our societal make-up will change and be more progressive.

    5 Reasons to Keep a Travel Diary #AtoZChallenge

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    1. Yes, with changing times, and women who will choose to stand up for themselves, societal norms and make up will definitely change for better.

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  2. ज्यादा अच्छी स्थिति है जब लड़का आगे बढ़ कर बिना दहेज विवाह करें। इससे लड़की के मन में उसके लिए सम्मान बढ़ेगा। बहुत सी लड़कियां ऐसी भी हैं जो चाहतीं हैं कि उसके माता-पिता खूब सारा उसे दहेज दें। लेकिन इस दहेज के लालच ने बहुत घर खराब करें हैं।

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    1. मैंने ऐसी काफ़ी लड़कियों को देखा है, जिन्हें अपने माता पिता को देख के बुरा लगता था लेकिन वो हमेशा कहती थी की हमारे यहाँ ऐसा ही होता है। जब तक ये भावनाएँ रहेंगी की ऐसा ही होता है, तब तक कुरीतियाँ कभी ख़त्म नहीं होंगी।

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  3. Reminds me of a scene from a Tamil movie. The newly married husband is harassing the wife for dowry. She will reply angrily: When I was young, my mom used to bathe me, put talcum powder on me, and dress me. After I reached certain age, she stopped looking at me. But now, a few hours after you tying my thaali (mangal sutra) I have to stand in front of you completely naked. And for that, we have to pay you (dowry) also. What kind of world we are living in.

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    1. SG thankyou for quoting that dialogue. People should realize how ugly the word dowry is, and how stressful it becomes for parents of girl child to start planning for it, so when the time comes they are prepared. It is really pathetic when some girls want their parents to give as much money as possible to the in-laws for their further comfort.

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  4. Every daughter ought to fight for her dreams and aspirations like the protagonist of your story. Also, not just the girl, but also her parents should avoid paying dowry, to put an end to this social evil.

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  5. Good initiative to write these dribbles. I rather think it's desire a wife, not a dowry. Do parents really need to be this involved in their children's marriages?
    http://www.kalpanaawrites.com

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    1. I dont know when will there be that time, when parents will be happy in their children’s happiness without putting any demands on the table...

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  6. Desire a daughter and not a dowry... unfortunately its the women who demand the dowry for their sons.. liked your post ending, she did not give up her desire to study...

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    1. I agree, women mostly put forward the greed for those things despite being women.

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  7. Marriage expenses should be divided among both families as it's the responsibility from both sides not only one... moreover girl is leaving everything, many a times sacrificing a lot for her new family.. so this dowry things n putting expenses only on one family should end...

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    1. Thankyou so much for adding more meaning to the post Ashima. I concur with you, totally.

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Thankyou for your feedback :)

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